WORKING NOT WORKING

Electronic equipment at work always seems to have a way of making me look like a fool.

All it takes for a software error to vanish or for a laptop to get connected to the office network is to take it to IT Support (or call them to my desk). And when I try to demonstrate what's not working - it works ABSOLUTELY fine, making them wonder if the only things not working are my eyes.

MAADI MAADBEDA (DON'T DO THE DO)

I am constantly irritated by the use/abuse of the word "maadi" in the Kannada language by urban colloquial speakers. For those who don't know, 'maadi' means 'do'. It makes me feel sad everytime I hear the word because it loudly rings the silent death of the language. No one needs to know the verb in Kannada anymore; just use an English verb, suffix 'maadi' and voila, the job is done! Stop maadi, Adjust maadi, Jump maadi, Dance maadi, etc.

And then, there are those who think they are cool and use the word even more atrociously like 'cool maadi' and 'have fun maadi', shattering whatever stupid grammatical logic that existed in the first place. But the award goes to this guy who screamed (in a crowded BMTC bus) - "Driver, back door open maadi!!"
Driver + back + door + open + MAADI!!?!

Aamir Khan recently said that he's ashamed he can't speak Marathi, his state language, well. That made me think - I've been in Karnataka for close to five years now, and I still cannot read/write Kannada or speak it as fluently as I would like to. When I landed in Bangalore, I began learning with a vengeance, but that enthusiasm gradually waned. I think about the reasons(excuses)...

1. I realised I could get around with my two-bit Kannada - with shopkeepers, autodrivers etc. Very few people speak pure Kannada, and colloquial urban Kannada (like most other Indian languages today) is junked with English words.
2. Also, knowing Telugu, Tamil and two-bit Hindi made me further lazy because knowing these languages covers most people in Bangalore.
3. Not having a constant practice-partner.
4. Most 'Learn Kannada' books are useless, because they focus on a pure form of Kannada that is not spoken anymore, or do not explain grammar very well.

However, when I don't know how to say something in Kannada, I use a different language. I don't do 'maadi or other funny concoctions.

Searching frantically for steely resolve.

TO HELL AND BACK

Finally have an internet connection at home - will be able to resume blogging regularly again! Getting a connection, however was hell! The small fry ISPs had deadly tariffs and limited bandwidth, while many major players did not operate in the area I live. I was reduced to opting for BSNL. From this, you can understand my desperation.

From the minute I filled out the application form in the BSNL office till the time the modem was installed in my house, I've broken the Limca Record for the maximum number of phone calls to a single company regarding a single issue. No one gives you solutions, everyone has numbers of the "right person" to hand out, you are forced to travel from one end of the city to another across various BSNL offices!

The broadband speed is not exactly the promised 256 kbps, but definitely faster than some other ISPs I have seen in the past. It's a pity that BSNL customer service sucks - in fact it would be an insult to BSNL to mention that they have a customer service department.

MORON? GET SIFY BROADBAND

UNLIMITED
/^nlImItId/
adjective

Oxford Dictionary: unrestricted; enormous
Merriam-Webster: lacking any controls; not bounded by exceptions
Roget's Thesaurus: having no restrictions; without exception; absolute
Cambridge Advanced Learner's Dictionary: not limited; infinite

Sify Broadband Dictionary: 150 MB upload/download limit per day, beyond which there will be a reduction in validity of one day for every 25 MB of extra usage in that calendar day.

I realised this bitter fact after downloading 275 MB today, and finding 6 days chopped off my account. And the bottom feeders don't even have a warning asterisk (conditions apply or the likes) on their tariff chart! (they do now on their website, but definitely did not when I bought the pack. Well, even if they do, it still shouldn't be called "unlimited"?) It just says "Unlimited Family Pack - 256 kbps". Connectivity is pathetic and speed is "shared".

Now lets go deeper into how Sify defines a few more terms:

SHARED: You will never ever get the maximum speed of 256 kbps. If you get 128, thank your stars!
ALWAYS ON: You will be disconnected atleast 10 times in 10 minutes.

I have some really nice words to say about these daylight robbers. In fact, a list of words. READ ENTIRE LIST