Monday, August 08, 2005

MERA NAAM JOKER

I have this thing for card pack jokers. I collect them. And if there's a circus in town, I visit it. Just to watch the clowns.

Raj Kapoor in Mera Naam JokerMy obsession with the Joker started several years ago, when I first saw Raj Kapoor's Mera Naam Joker. Till then, I was struggling for imagery that would best describe my fun-loving yet easily hurting nature, and the Joker seemed to fit so perfectly! Till date, Mera Naam Joker remains one of my favourite movies. For those who haven't watched it, it is the story of Raju who wants to become a famous clown, and his life that chronicles through three women, all resulting in heartbreak. All the three women who go on to lead happy lives, one day suddenly receive an invitation to attend Raju Joker's final stage performance: the four-hour movie begins thus! Brilliant background score and songs like Jeena Yahaan Marna Yahaan, Jaane Kahaan Gaye Woh Din wrench my heart each time I listen to them! After I watched the movie, I remember I did not eat or sleep properly for two whole days!

Aboorva Sagodharargal (Appu Raja in Hindi) is another movie that presented the tragic joker very well. Even today, I can't believe how many hours I cried for that scene where Appu realises that he is only the best man and not the bridegroom, leading to the song, "Unna Nenachen Paattu Padichen". The images of the joker in that song, dancing with the angelic girl in white who is snatched away by the taller guy, haunt me whenever I think of the song.

My third favourite association with the Joker is the Lucky Ali song "Nahin Rakhtha Dil" from his album Sifar. Brilliant voice, brilliant song that simply tugs at my heart and braids it into two french plaits, each time I hear it!! The song is about a joker (played by Lucky Ali) and his heartbreak with a circus girl whom he thinks loves him, but she goes on to become the circus owner's mistress.

Me and my jokerIn this picture, I am sitting by my windowsill (my favourite place in the house). Sitting beside me is my Joker. He has been hurt many times, been taken for more rides than a life member of MGM Dizzee World, and has had his heart used by people until they moved on to better things in life. I'm surprised that he still smiles. He has known people who've misused words like "friend", "lover", and even "brother". I'm surprised that he still believes in relationships.

Would you like to wave a "Hi" to him? :-)

48 comments:

Anonymous said...


sure makes you think, u been thru it all doesnt it !! :)

guess thats what makes life all that more interesting..

therez always a lil bit of everythnig.. !!

the best and the worst !!

I hear you pal..loud and clear..!!

am sure there are loadsa ppl
who can empathize with their share..

Ranjini said...

Are you okay?

tamilan said...

hi joker
make sure ur friend is smiling too...

Viewer said...

Hi :) u know this a classic post:) Well written and well projected. 美麗的著作

யாத்திரீகன் said...

hey machi..

>>He has known people who've >>misused words >>like "friend", "lover", and >>even "brother". I'm surprised >>that he still believes in >>relationships.

oru second.. bayangara feelings-aa aachupa.. padichadhum..

hm.. Apoorva Sagodharargal-la andha paatu nenachalay.. enaku andha dance sequence dhaan niyabagam varum.. and that scene where his ring is removed.. IR music-kum, kamal kanula velila varadha andha kaneer thuliyum.. manasai ennamo seiyudhu...

any prblm with ur friends or someone special ?! .. just leave it aside for a moment.. sit back and take a sip of a cup of orange juice..

Manoj said...

Hey,

"nahin raktha dil" is an amazing song...Infact I am listening to it as I am typing this reply.

// He has known people who've misused words like "friend", "lover", and even "brother". I'm surprised that he still believes in relationships. //

It could be worse when someone whom you trust calls you a psycho and realises its not gonna work out only after 3 years :-)

Kozhappama irukka? sondha kadhai soga kadhai...but honestly there's a lot more to life and i am sure you are aware of it too.

vinesh : joker :: manoj : Ed

Ed's my alter ego :-)

M.

krishna said...

dude..

never thot u'd go this emotive (at least in ur orange juice) ..

btw..those songs that u mentioned are equally emotional in content and music ..nice songs tho..

Vinesh said...

@Anonymous: I haven't been through it all...but I've been through a lot. And I'm not saying I'm the only one who's been through a lot. The post was about the form or the image that I have given to my emotions - a joker. Everyone with a heart gets hurt. I'm sure you would have, too..Maybe you just have that emotion listed under a different image.

@Ranjini: I sure am! :-) Just reflections of last night..

@Tamilan: Your post has already made joker's friend smile :-)

Vinesh said...

@Viewer: I'm happy you liked it buddy :-) It came straight from the heart!

@Senthil: I'm sure all of us have experienced betrayal at some point or the other, be it any relationship. Adhaan ungalukkum feelings-aayidchu :-) And I'm happy I have friends in the blogworld to offer me a glass of orange juice...thanks Senthil :-)

Vinesh said...

@Manoj/Ed:
Sorry to hear about your relationship that turned sour after 3 years... I call it the thondakkuzhiyile paarangal feeling.

May I have your email id? You could leave it here, in the main page chat box, or email me. Speaking of alter egos, I don't know how many I have ..LOL

@Krishna: Most of my writing seemed to have gotten lost in my last paragraph, where I mentioned my joker :-) Thanks for noticing the films and the songs too :-)

<<never thot u'd go this emotive (at least in ur orange juice)>>
Where else do I go buddy, orange juice is all I have :-)

Orange Fronkey said...

*hands you a glass of orange juice with ice cubes*

Take it easy. *waves hi to your joker friend*

ioiio said...

True.. Most jokers are ppl who smile only with his face.. Like me..

Maybe Because he cudnt smile elsewhere and he just wanted that platform to smile..

Ranjini said...

Check your gmail. I sent you some orange juice..

maha said...

yeah, sometime or the other, all of us are jokers. ourhearts dont smile, our lips do.

divyasurendiran said...

Hi Vinesh's joker :)

monu said...

itha padichu romba feelings a pochu.....
mathavangala sirikka vekkaran vangalukkulla naraiya sogam irukkum nu solluvaanga.....
hmmm....

don't bother about anything or even relationships.....just think that you must care for yourself and beleive in GOD, that is my philosophy....i am not being cynical..just that expecting anything from others and them not living upto it leads to unnecesary pain..thats y..take care of yourself....god will always be with you..and be good to one and all..no matter who they are..or how they are to you...smile up buddy!..it isn;t such a bad world too......

and misuse of words..i have heard it a lot...particularly when people misuse the word "friend"..it gets on my nerves..........

Anu said...

Vinesh, life is like a rollacoaster.. for few its like the one in mGm Dizze world avalavu bayama errukadhu.. silla perukku disney landla errukurdha madiri..thalakila pogum :)But the more u suffer..its for sure that ur gonna be really happy in future

i totally agree with monu.."you must care for yourself"..

JokerKu en vanakam

Dreamvendor said...

Say 'Hi' to your friend! *with vodka and orange juice for a change*

Reminds me of something I read somewhere - A guy named A seemed very upset and was in tears. Another guy named B who walked by, suggested him to go to the circus and watch the clown. B promised A that the clown will make him happy and he will forget his worries. A replied, "I'm the clown in that circus'.... I keep telling this story to myself time and again.

The orange juice has gotten a bit concentrated?!

Somu said...

Dude, whats brewing ? Now why would you wanna recall kamal's sad state of affairs in Aboorva Sagotharargal ??

Incidentally both these movies had something sad to say about the protagonists...

Enna matter ?

Jeevan said...

Hi joker. joker makes people happy including me.

Paavai said...

The way you use words is amazing - tugs at my heart and braids it inot two french plaits - very well written

Life is such that - happiness and sadness, cruelty and kindness - coexist. The movie Mrs and Mr Iyer is an exemplary one that depicts this aspect of life

Fathima said...

There r jokers everywhere in the world. No matter how much they r hurt, they HAVE to keep a smiling face.
My "Hi" to another identified joker.

Ravi said...

Vinesh, reading your post, I was reminded of these words which I read sometime back :

"Believe in the Sun
even when it's not shining
Believe in Love
even when you are alone
and Belive in God
even when He is silent"

Come on! Cheer up!! Fellow bloggers can't afford to see Vinesh drown in his frowns!! Hoping to see the second sequel of "Principoll says".

Vinesh said...

@Merino: Mmm...Orange juice was great *grinning*

@Ioiio: Sathya, I certainly did not expect you to say this. I also read your blogpost about the friend who had a problem with you recently! :-(

I like the way you put it..."just wanted that platform to smile.." :-)

@Ranjini: Yuppity madam. Will check and respond :-)

Vinesh said...

@Maha: Yes. Funnily, the people whom we make happy are ones who make us happy by their happiness!

@Divyasurendiran: Joker says Hi to you too :o)

@Monu: Your comments were very warm Monu...thanks so much :-) I live because I still believe in love. And Love is God! :o)

priya said...

i m shit scared of dolls.. scared if they'll come alive and kill me :( u know.. "child's play" types!! so nvr go near themm be it stuffed dolls or puppets.. clowns.. watevr.. mommy!!!!!!!!!
..p..

Vinesh said...

@Anu:Your MGM - Disneyland comparison was ultimate...thathuva dheivamaaaeeeey! LOL :-)

@DreamVendor: That story was BRILLIANT! I LOVED it! Thanks so much for that! Vodka - I wonder how that tastes :-) Orange juice has become concentrated? Haha, they say some people can drink alcohol "raw" while some need to mix soda with it ;-)

Vinesh said...

@Somu: Haha, no girl left me to marry a taller guy Somu, haha, I'm 6'0" myself, LOL! I have people to love me enough, today. This was just a muse about the ones who played with my heart, those countless people :-)

@Jeevan: Joker says Hi to you Jeevan. Have a nice day :o)

@Paavai: Thanks Paavai. I must watch Mrs & Mr. Iyer sometime...it's definitely on my list!

Grey Vampire said...

Hey people call me a joker many a times...so may be i am ur true fren....But i hate to wish u happy friend ship day...why???see my new post

Vinesh said...

@Fathima:
Kehta hai joker saara zamaana..
Aadhi haqeeqat.. aadhaa fasana..
Chashma utharo...phir dekho yaaro..
Duniya nayi hai.. chehra puraana!
:o)

@Ravi: Hey buddy, I never meant to get anybody down with my post. Thought everyone would relate to some part of sorrow within them, that they try to mask in front of others :o) Touched by your concern...Principoll says Part 2 is coming to a blog near you...sooooon ;-)

@Priya: I think you saw Jenma Natchathiram movie when you were young LOL! (Omen in Tamil) :-)

vasanthi said...

Countless people aaa-aa next aa next types. Pasangaana oru 10 pethoda infactuation, 4 pethoda love, 1 personoda uyira viduralavukku love appuram finally ella girls um waste nnu terinjhadhukku appuram oru ponnoda kalyanam pannikanuk-adhan life-enjoy- you can not change these frend apalaginene sonna girls

Fathima said...

Agar mein, chashmaa uthaarkar dekhun, tho kuch nahin dikhai dethaa;-)
P.S: Anyway, I don't wear spectacles.

Maharajan said...

Dei Vinesh... unakku ennada vayasaaguthu???? Adhukkulla ennada ivlo depression????
Ennai pondra senior citizensay kavalai illamal suthumbodhu.. unakku ennada ivlo prachanai???
Idhai padicha udan I wanted to kottufy your head... and I am surprised at the number of mourners commenting on this site...

Okay, all that aside.... just take everything with a smile maan... as someone said "this too shall pass..."

Perspective matters...

Make Sab chalta hai... your attitude, man....

PS: It's not like I've had a rosy life all through... it's only how I choose to react that makes me say stuff like this...
And it is totally possible that I just overreacted.. if that happened, just excuse... :)

Neha said...

Hi Vinesh,
Came here from Sriram s blog (ID Card). Been reading ur posts for sometime now ... U got a good blog here. This post romba nenja thottuteenga I actually cry everytime I hear these songs. Yeah everyone can relate to anothers heart-break(s?) I guess. After all at some point of time someone is bound to betray someone else.
PS says "hi" and telss him to never lose faith:)

vasanthi said...

Hi Vinesh-nethy ellarum unga blog padichu sirichaanga. Innaiki adhe makkal unga blog paarthy feel pannuraanga. Idhu dhan blogging oda power nnu ninaikiren-enna solreenga

யாத்திரீகன் said...

hey buddy..
ennna nerathula machi indha topic-ai kaila edutha..

:-(

no words to speak.. now i need a big JUG of Orange Juice i think :-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( X-( aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

I remember watching Mera Naam Joker a long long time ago. Don't remember the story though :-(
Hi to your joker though!!!

Vani Viswanathan said...

hi!
nice post :)
just learnt to take everything, everything in the stride....just learnt there is no point thinking about something again...and...just..oh wait, i basically came here to tell ya that the blog has been updated on your highness' request! :P
(and that means you don't say grrr...or anything like that!yeah!)

Ayshu said...

Think uve got a sad happening DEEP inside ur HEART

Vinesh said...

@Vasanthi: It's not as if I was infatuated with 10, love with 4, live with 1 etc... hehe.. somehow the examples I gave seemed to convey more loss in love with a romantic interest than with a friend or "sister". Hmm..

And yeah, I really didn't expect so much response to this post...just thought it would pass away..like my "Nursery Rhymes" post a few days ago.

@Fathima: Haha :-D

Vinesh said...

@Maharajan: Hey buddy cool...:-) It's not as if I typed this post standing on the edge of Suicide Point, LOL!

I'm okay...I really really am :-) And if I'm not, it's not more than anybody else in this world ;-)

@Neha: Thanks Neha. And it's nice to meet someone who enjoys these songs the same way I do..

@Senthil: Enna aachu, did I touch some personal chord? :-( Sorry buddy, edhavadhu irundha shoot me an e-mail.. we can have a cup of orange juice and talk..

Vinesh said...

@Kr00pz: Joker says Hi to you too :o)

@Vani: Thanks for updating your blog madam, will check it out :-)

@Ayshu: You are right Ayshu. But I'm sure I'm not alone in this world...worse has happened to many..

Ram.C said...

as someone had pointed out, sometimes the dolls look scarier.. like the one you have.

Vinesh said...

@Ram.C: Haha, the poor guy deserves a better picture... but then maybe, Kaakkai-kkum than joker pon joker...:-P

Ayshu said...

Yes for the matter of fact, NO ONE is alone in this world...Life grows with experiences and guess u wud've grown much more than u've xpected...
Just ignore ur failures and count them as ur key to success...

romba too much aa thathuvam pozhinjuten la...
its ok..
i know u all can adjust
;-)

Aishwarya said...

Very moving, indeed! :)

harry said...

i am really moved by this post..somehow i guess all of us have the joker in us.the same feelings i have experienced with my friends but witha girl..no..anyways nice post..

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